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student ministry, youth ministry, youth worker

Life Transforming Relationships

By Doug Franklin June 21, 2010

People transform people. Tech toys and TV can’t change someone like a great mentor can. Social media is powerful, but not as powerful as a mature believer sitting down with a teachable young leader and pouring his/her life into them. I know in my life, the greatest satisfaction comes from having a vulnerable relationship with another person who is like minded. If this is true, how do we build stronger relationships?

1. Discover other people
We have to be masters at the art of asking questions; asking open-ended ones that make people think and uncover something about themselves. These questions unlock personality, values, and hidden secrets. When the question is asked properly, people will want to open their heart and tell you things they have never told someone before.

2. Never measure
Often in relationships we measure ourselves against others. We look at the other person and want what they have, or we value the person based on what they have. Relationships work best when both people see value in each other and themselves. God has given us all amazing gifts, be happy with yours.

3. Confess
In scripture James says, “confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed.” Notice we are not forgiven, only Jesus does that, we are healed. There is something special about telling someone your short comings, it releases guilt and allows us to say to each other, “I have been there and I know what your going through.”  At this moment, relationship is at its finest.

About the Author

Doug Franklin

Doug Franklin is the president of LeaderTreks, an innovative leadership development organization focusing on students and youth workers. Doug and his wife, Angie, live in West Chicago, Illinois. They don’t have any kids, but they have 2 dogs that think they are children. Diesel and Penelope are Weimaraners  who never leave their side. Doug grew up in…  Read More